Happy with me……..

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I am very broke, physically and financially just now BUT for the record I have NEVER in my life to date felt just SO good.

Filling my life with what I love, doing what I believe in, surrounding myself with positive, independant, brave, create & supportive people makes me feel…..anything is possible.

I am thankfull that the matter of days before I mark a significant Birthday landmark in my life, I am able to be in such a great & grounded place with myself.

I am me finally and I like and respect the me that I am.

I have learned to live in my present and to enjoy and apreciate the now……

I can NOT change or alter my past…….just to reflect on it, accept it,move on and learn from it.

I can not directly affect my future other than to be the best me today that I can.

My Once Upon a Time is not a fairytale one but it is the story of me, and I own it and embrace who it has made me.

I was born to a small loving family in Neath South Wales, I thankfully have both patent’s still and one younger brother.

I grew up went to infant’s, junior & comprehensive school’s in Neath, did ok achedemicaly just doing what I had to. I had fun being a teenager and living near the coast with friends.

I dated and socialised and went on holiday’s and listened to music and read books and learned what I liked. I survived a rape and dealt with it alone and with support from a local Woman`s support group, the shame and fear of what happened made me detetmined to deal with it and move on a survivor.

I started work in the Civil Service whilst all my Alevel buddies went off to Uni, I started again made new friends. I became a life model to an Achedemic organisation but did not reveal this to my family. ( They won’t but if they did I just outed myself again)

I met my ex husband at work fell in Love, planned a wedding and moved to Reading with his career.  I found my career in IT Sales gave birth to the MOST AMAZING baby girl in any time dimension.Met two amazing women with whom I am blessed to still be friends.

I SURVIVED the reposession of my home because my ex husband had a secret Gambelling addiction, We told nobody and survived it alone.

Progressed my career beyond all my own expectation`s and hopes over 19+ years working in & about Reading in IT Sales,Internal & External Sales Teamleader & Manager & Manager of Managers, I worked for and with the best and the worst that HP & Dell had to test me with.  Won many sales awards and prizes, achievements personal and team. I was respected and desliked and was sucsessfull and failed and was happy and heartbroken all through it all.

Moved back to Wales to be with my family only to see that my real family was in the South East and the one at home did not understand,like or appreciate who I had become.  I became adopted & adored by my best friend Miss Dacy Bear Davies the world’s BEST dog.  I gave up work.

Survived the SECOND reposession of my most loved and treasured home…..moved “home” to my Father’s house and learned the hard way you can NOT go backwards in your life.

Lived in a homeless shelter for 18months by the saving grace of Port Talbot Woman’s Aid.  With specific Emotional & Financial Abuse counselling I can finally own my past and accept who I have become and to love myself for the first time ever.

I dated and played the field, discovering that I was actually preety dam hot…..if I do say so myself!

I wrote and attended to the ticking off of rather a specific single person’s bucket list of have to’s and need to’s……..which was fun ad very educational & enlightening.

I applied for my dream degree course…..was offered a place and am JUST the luckiest girl in the whole world doing a BA in Architectural Glass.

I met my soul’s counterpoint in a man with whom I have never experienced with anyone before the same level’s of mutual feeling of love and respect and adoration and admiration.  We just get eachother, we fit, and it is the bedrock of our joint existence on which everything else stand’s.

We currently live geographically apart but we are in love and always will be together.

To Be Continued…………….

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